It's my chaos, which is why I choose to accept it!

This past week has been utter CHAOS! But it's my chaos, which is why I choose to accept it. I probably shouldn't be blogging right now because I have so much to do, but hey, what can I say? I'm officially addicted :)

Well, last week felt like it was never going to end. Monday I sent off my first letter to Cass up in Oregon. She said that she received it Friday and I canNOT wait to hear back from her! I love letters! The week was just so slow and boring. Well, finally, Saturday came and I had to work till three and then I went over to Shawna's for Britani to cut my hair. Yeah, I cut a lot off. If you look closely, you can see the difference. (It kind of blends in with my vest thingy)

After being at Shawna's for a bit too long, I went over to Alex's house to hang out with him, Izak, Michael, Kaden and Kallie! Man, I never get tired of hanging out with those guys! They are such a blast! I think the pictures explain enough as is. Heehee :)

Yes, these are four different feet, but they are also only from two people. Haha, Kal and I gave up long ago on trying to match socks.

 

 

Haha, allow me to explain. Alex was trying to get Izak and Kaden to lift sixty pounds while standing up against the wall... of course, he was the only one that could do it. Everybody also arm-wrestled everybody. No doubt about it, I was of course the weakest. Alex wouldn't even try because he said that he was waiting for me to try... and I was...

We also established the fact that I have really small hands. While my ring finger is a 4 1/2, Izak's is a 9, Alex and Kaden couldn't even fit my CTR ring (fit for my ring finger) on their pinkies.

Also, Alex and I attempted to get a picture of the two of us that we've been trying to get for months! Although we had many sad attempts and failed (already knowing we would have to do it a BAJILLION times to get it right) we've already got another scheduled time to try again, and I'll be prepared this time! (let's hope) Here is one of our few sad attempts. Haha! (The thing is, is that Alex looks great in like all of these, but I'm just kind of there. I mean, I'm pretty sure it was the lighting, and yes that does make a huge difference, so we're gonna try my backyard the next time we get together and try in a couple of weeks)

This next one is my favorite, just because it's totally not posed, it's just, "Oh! Let's take a picture really quick".

Haha, sad I know. We're also going to be a bit more eclectic ((my new favorite word, meaning diverse or different)) the next time we get together and try a few different things.

We also found Alex's real laugh. I've heard just about every single one of my friends' real laugh, but his. Trust me, I definitely got a kick out of it. It was absolutely hilarious. I almost died laughing.
Okay, and then these next two pictures are basically the reason why these guys are my favorite and why I hang out with them so much. We can cram on a couch ALL TOGETHER at ONCE! Haha, okay, it's really not that hard. There are only 6 of us, but the craziness and happiness that they bring me keeps me euphoric and the different things that we come up with to keep ourselves occupied also holds many treasured memories!

One with Michael... and then we pushed him off...

And then Little Aaron Blackham jumped on. Haha, I love that kid. The coolest 5 year old I've ever met!

Something else that has also started to help fill up my schedule even more is Pippin! It's going to be a blast, I can already tell! Even after just two rehearsals!

Me, Kallie and Craig

Brandon, Steven, Chase and Chance getting pumped up for rehearsal... a warm-up I guess you could call it.

Haha, and yes, I know this is creepy... but it's Chase and Craig... what else could you expect???

Well, nothing much of anything else is going on. I've got solo/ensemble tomorrow and hopefully I'll get lucky. I shouldn't do too horrible. I've got my song memorized and Alex is playing for me, so we'll have to see how it goes. Lovely, lovely... well, anyways, let's see... I had an orthodontist appointment yesterday... We've found out that my teeth are impacted and so I'm going to be needing my wisdom teeth out soon. (soon as in a couple of months soon) I'm scared and I'm worried but I'm not going to talk about it a lot so if you do end up reading this, I'd rather we not talk about it unless you REALLY want to know what's going to have to happen. And can I just say that I REALLY love the orthodontist? I mean, my teeth are getting to be so happy.. teehee :) but really, they're super nice and I love them all to death!!! It's fantastic.

And one last additional thing... I love seminary! Cute boys and a strong spiritual feeling throughout the whole room! It just does not get any better than that!

Just Simply BE Yourself

There are 2 words that I will never be able to enjoy in this life. EVER. And those two words, my friends are right up there with Satan and hate. Those gruesome words being at the top of my list of words I hate (haha, see the irony here) are the two words of "actor's" and "homework". Whenever I think of those two words together it's like a car crash inside of my brain. The screeching wheels, screaming and well... either serious injury or dying. Take your pick. As much as I love Broberg, I wish that acting wasn't such a hard thing to be committed to. I love it so much and after yesterday's lesson and lecture, I remember why I've kept acting as long as I have. When you get to the point of BEING the character rather than ACTING the character, then you start to solve things up. As Broberg would say, you have to get buried into that deep pit of old memories that you aren't accustomed to handling anymore. They've been shoved away and put into the deep dark depths of your mind to forever and always STAY there. Nope, not when you're with Agnes. She'll dig through your subconcious and pull them right out of there no matter how hard you try to rip them out of her hands and shove them back in. Ladies and gentlemen, Agnes Broberg will literally take that bottom filing cabinet with all the messy stuff in it (you know the one with all the greasy papers and the old food and crap that you're not strong enough to clean out because the smell and horrible-ness of it is too awful?) and turn it upside down and dump it all out into your brain. This speaking metaphorically of course. Not only is it messy, but it gets bad and feelings come out and turn people and bring out emotions in people that are UNREAL. It's absolutely (I can't believe I'm saying this).... Incredible.

I remember during Fiddler there were so many things I loved about it but the one thing that always made me feel the best (and the worst) at the same time, was the despair and roller coaster of emotion that I felt as I WAS Chava. Not acting as Chava would, but BEING Chava. I can definitely tell you that I've never been disowned by my family, nor have I ever (or wanted to) run away from home to be with someone else, BUT I have felt the depression and the heartache enough to pull it out and use that emotion. BEING Chava was something so UNREAL that it became real. Which leads me to my next topic: Relate this to yourself. Some of you may not know what it's like to be onstage, let alone being some one/thing totally and completely different than what you are. You can relate this to yourself people! It's just like being yourself.

Put it into perspective. Wait, or are you not understanding how this could possibly relate to you stage-deprived people? Or even you stage-junkies??? You don't get it either? Well, let me elaborate for you. A lot of people, especially in this day and age, are always asking "who am I?" "What would I normally do?" "What am I supposed to do with my life?" These existential questions can never truly be answered by anybody but yourself and the people that are around you 24/7 (and maybe God ;) ) All of these questions can be answered to some point but not always fully, that's for sure. You get going on "who you are" and then you end and when you can't think of anything else, you still just are not simply satisfied with the novel that you've just written inside yourself. My point is, just like BEING the characters, we should stop trying to act like ourselves and just BE ourselves. It's really just as easy as that. We just make it appear harder than it seems to be. Your heart knows exactly who you are, but your brain makes you think about it too much and then you lose that self-esteem and actually start caring about what other people think, I mean, what kind of person does that? (like everybody in the entire planet). All I'm saying is that in order to get the full effect out of life (just like on stage) you just have to be yourself and stop trying to ACT like yourself. So if you're going to take anything from this post, take and remember this. Stop trying to ACT and just BE. It's as easy as that.

I can't exactly say much because I do it all the time, but I know that if we think too much about our futures and what's ahead, rather then what's right in front of us, here and now! It's a complete pain but it's completely easier to think of 10 years ahead rather than next week or tomorrow, or even the next hour that's approaching. In order to get to the then we have to get through the now. Bummer, I've gotta stop making plans for the future! Wrong-o! I heard this quote the other day and it say "Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." I think I've said enough on that topic. Just don't think too hard about being yourself. It's naturally second nature to you so stop thinking about it and get on with your life!

(http://th00.deviantart.net/fs18/300W/i/2008/134/7/1/Be_Yourself_by_Xerces.jpg)

Welcome to the Family

Welcome to the family everybody! These are the most current family photos of the craziness! It's quite exciting really :) Hope you enjoy these pictures!!!

Spring Cleaning

So lately I've been in one of those MAJOR cleaning mojo's. [also considered my "spring cleaning" although it snowed like 6 inches today...] It's been absolutely great and I'm hoping that it'll all turn out for the better and maybe I'll be able to keep this new feeling of neat-freakish....ness... This break has been absolutely crazy and today was the first day in the whole break that I haven't been super busy at all. Alright, yesterday, for the first time in pretty much a really long time, I had the chance to be IN FRONT of the camera rather than behind it [really, it's more weird than you might think]. I went with Katie and it was an a really fun time. It was rather cold, but it was fantastic! She put a sneak peak on her blog [http://ktcfair.blogspot.com/] and I instantly became absolutely euphoric [my word of the day] over it. It's absolutely amazing. Katie is my photographing idol. I'm also excited to see if we'll be able to become better friends through the whole photography thing. Well, if not that then anything else :)

Then we went straight to Nate's birthday party [which was a blast by the way]. We watched GI Joe [pending as my new favorite movie] and then Maddi came and helped me clean and organize until 2 o'clock this morning before we crashed and then slept in till about... oh noon... haha, it's been a while since I've been able to do that.

Well, I'd better go get the rest of my area cleaned up and organized and get some laundry going so I can actually start thinking about getting started on that book report... haha. Adios amigos!

Fall 2009

Well, just realizing that I haven't written anything updated anything lately made me quite sad. Life has been great lately since I've found a new love for the spirit. They're definitely right, fake it till you make it. Before I was annoyed with people, and honestly, pretending to be okay and unannoyed by them made it that way for me. It's been great, really. I will admit that I've had a few extremely emotional moments, but hey, don't we all? Anyways, I just feel that the Lord has blessed me sincerely in my life with great friends, an amazing family and an awesome school. I know that I haven't been very happy with high school yet, but let me tell you... it's just getting better all the while because I'm doing something about it.

Halloween was pretty much awesome. (Pictures will be posted later) Not only was it a great day of work, it was also a great day of fun and laughter. After work, I decided that I didn't want to dress up for Lisa's party, so I just dressed up all nice and wore Dad's funny old glasses. We watched "Wait Until Dark" with Audrey Hepburn. Not the most entertaining movie I've ever seen but I don't think that I've ever sat through a whole movie that was made in the 60s... Haha, anyways...

The weekend before Halloween, I got to spend the weekend at Carly's house for 4 nights while my parents went down to Porterville, California for the cross-country banquet. What an adventure that was. Sadly enough, we were so busy that we didn't really take any pictures. I actually did end up with a picture of Alex (a kind of blurry one) and a picture of our cookie dough that we made, on the pan with Carly's hand over it (also another blurry one). Ah, well, the memories will always be in my heart.

SO lately I've been working on Personal Progress and have been blessed to know that they DO have those experiences in there for us to learn from. I know that setting the goal of being nicer to people and boosting their self-confidence has boosted mine immensely. It's a great thing to be nice to other people and actually care about what's going on in their lives and caring about how they're doing. It really boosted my spirits when I was told that some of my good friends had been sharing the difference in my attitude to their young women group and how it affected the people around me. Being a bit down yesterday when I heard this, it immediately made me feel up again and I felt like I knew there was a reason that I was supposed to be doing this.

The holidays are coming up and I just absolutely canNOT wait!!! This year should be great. I'll be going to Vegas with my parents on the first weekend of December and then I'm absolutely ecstatic to go back to Phoenix again in January. It should be simply great! Haha, anyways, let's see... what else has been going on in life?

Well, it's Tuesday and it's a pretty good one at that. I hope everyone is having a fabulous day! :]

Halloween is only beginning...

It's the second day of Fall Break and nothing like hanging out at grandma's house and helping her hang up some Halloween decorations. Considering, this hasn't been the first real beginning. Yesterday I had the chance to go over to Carly's and hang out with her and Craig. We watched a 4 and a half rendition of Shakespeare's "Hamlet" and let me tell ya... we were anxious to get out of the house. We walked over to Geneva Park but soon found that we couldn't really entertain ourselves very well. We then marched on over to Craig's house and made cookies!! What an adventure that was...

We then found ourselves playing GuitarHero... You'll have to look on Facebook for the videos... hahahaha... We then decided to get the costume boxes out. I think the pictures can explain themselves...

Another thing that I forgot to add earlier this week was that on Saturday Mom and Cevan made it to Hale Center Theater's "Highway to Hale" race. They ran the 5k; not sure of the times but they both finished and so did Shawnie and Nena :) Oh yeah... did I forget to mention that costumes were welcome?

 

Also today grandma and I have been decorating up the house for the festivities of Halloween. Let's just say I can't wait to have my own house to decorate! :)